I finished this one, but it was a narrow thing. There was a point about 60% through where I had trouble putting it down, which had me hopeful. Unfortunately, this effect didn’t last through the ending. By the end, I was watching the percentages the way I’d watch the clock at work near the end of the day.
Plot and Pace: Good concept, but the meandering of the plot made me impatient with it at several points. I wanted more to happen. A lot of introspection and angst. It was really slow to build up.
Style and Readability- All other things aside, I liked her writing style. I’d probably read something else by this author. And unlike a LOT of small/indie/self published works? I didn’t find a SINGLE typo!! That’s something to be commended! Great editing job.
Worldbuilding: I like the use of powers/abilities. While I objectively understand the kind of society she’s in, it stood at odds with the “normal” society by managing to be LESS mature than the shorter lived. There wasn’t much world built, beyond “Oh hey, those Grecian ‘Gods’ were really just our dumb grandparents showing off,” and “oh hey, there’s this Council who will kill you and any humans they want, with all the remorse you’d show at accidentally squashing an ant.”
Characters: I had a hard time relating to the main character. She was really shallow, despite life events that should have given her depth and maturity, and I didn’t find any other character enthralling. Even the romantic interest seemed flat, and everyone past that was cardboard.
As a writer, here’s what I took from this:
*Characters need to fit their world. If your characters are immortals, or incredibly long lived, that should MEAN something. It should influence the way they look at their world, at their lives. They should NOT just be long lived teenagers.
*Navel gazing should not be an Olympic sport. If your character spends more time ruminating about the events of the story than the events in the story take to occur, there’s a problem.